“I have something to tell you.”
Brad was a handsome dark-haired fella I met at a friend’s housewarming party. We were chatting and I noticed his amazing eyes that would just pull you right in. I also liked that he was a master of his domain, overcoming a job set back due to the economy and opening two businesses of his own at once; very ingenious and ambitious. Naturally, I asked him out on a date.
We had gone out for our third date, grabbing some delicious Mexican food and a few margaritas. We went back to his apartment and watched a little TV, and he asked me if I wanted to see more of his place and I said sure.
Brad took me to his bedroom and we sat down on the edge of his bed. I leaned in to kiss him and he backed away and said, “I have something to tell you” with a look of nervousness on his face.
At that moment my heart let out a big “Awe!!!” because I had a feeling what it was Brad had to tell me. I’ve dated and been in relationships with guys who are HIV positive, and I don’t look at someone’s HIV status as being a deterrent to dating them. In the time Brad and I spent together, we never had a conversation about HIV status, which I realized would explain his hesitancy and backing away when I leaned in for a kiss.
While I totally understood where he was coming from, there was also part of me that wanted him to come out with it so we could hug it out then get down to business. Brad was attractive both inside and out, and I was looking forward to spending time with him. I was glad he kept condoms out and on his night stand.
“It’s okay Brad. Continue with what you were saying.” I rubbed his leg and gave him the best understanding look I could without looking like a goof. He hesitated again, then got off the bed and walked over to the window. Wow. I wondered if I was the first person he told in this kind of situation. I really wanted to let him know that everything was going to be alright.
“I have” is all I heard before he trailed off. Then he looked at me and said it again, “I have herpes 1 and 2.”
“Okay. Can you tell me what that is?”
“Herpes 1 is oral herpes and herpes 2 is the genital form. I don’t really know how I got them but I’ve had both for several years.”
“Okay.”
“I’m really sorry to have to tell you this. Honestly, I haven’t been on a date with someone in a long time and haven’t been in a situation where I had to tell someone about this.”
“Brad, it’s totally cool. I’m glad you were honest and said something. It shows a great amount of respect for me and for yourself by saying something before things got heated, and I’m glad you stayed true to the guy I’ve gotten to know over our dates.” He smiled. “So,” I said bringing Brad back to the bed “what can we do and how can we do it in a way that’s safe?”
To be continued …
