Kissing Kamal

While I never claim to be an expert, I get a lot of email from folks looking for dating advice.  A large portion of the questions I receive relate to Grindr, as guys are looking for ways to be more appealing and have better chances at meeting other guys in real time.

One question that I get on a regular basis is, “why do guys block me on Grindr?”  I’ve written about better ways to approach men on Grindr here, and I definitely encourage guys to consider if they’re coming on too strong or sending signals that may be confusing.  But the one answer that applies most to the question of “why am I getting blocked,” in all likelihood comes down to one simple answer: maybe you’re being a douche.

Wondering what a Douchebag on Grindr might look like?  Well look no further, as the popular gay internet meme Douchebags of Grindr seeks to shine a light on douchey behavior in Grindr profiles.  The site posts pictures from Grindr profiles containing insensitive or offensive language.  Most of the profiles submitted have an arrogant tone to their language and say something like, “I don’t date [insert race here] so don’t even ask me,” or “I’m blocking you because [insert insensitive comment here].”

Because I was curious about this whole Douchebags of Grindr thing, I decided to interview the founder of the blog, who chatted with me under agreement of anonymity, and speak with Shaun F., whose Grindr profile was submitted to the Douchebags of Grindr website and had a few things of his own to say about it. Read more…

It's Judy Garland!

In the spirit of the Holidays I give you my following dating observations.  I did a similar post last year so consider this a re-pop with a twist and a splash of Patron.  If you fall into one of the categories below, yell “Judy Garland!”

The Real Housewives of the Holidays.  Yes gurl!  You are FAB-YOU-LOUS!  You closed on a fabulous downtown condo in the spring, spent a leisurely summer in a full share at the beach, received an enormous end of year bonus at work, and are dating a devastatingly handsome man with a ginormous uh, personality.  Yes gurl, you have won the Fabulosity Award for 2011 hands down, and you want everyone to know it.

Now if you play with boys who collect status and toys, and don’t need Santa to buy them anything, then have at it and put those bitches in their place when they try to say something catty about you’re well earned success.  But remember that not every Holiday party is a press junket for your Fabulosity, and that handsome man on your arm may start to wonder why all of your sentences begin with “I’m rich!”

Who’s that guy on the other Trivia Team? Is there a guy you’ve had your eye on all year but haven’t had the chance to talk to him yet?  Holiday parties are a good way to make your move and say hello.  People are generally in a good mood and open to meeting new people.  If you get the courage to finally go up to this guy and say hello, remember to ask him his name and whether he’s there with anyone.  Also remember to try and approach your potential future boyfriend before making it to the third drink, lest you get into the next holiday situation.

Go Slutty or Go Home! The Holidays are also a good time to be slutty.  You’ve had a long and hard year filled with tons of drama from a less than amicable break up.  Couple that with a string of awkward and tragic first dates and that’s it; you’ve decided to take a dating vacation to the land of Promiscuity.  I say have at it and be sure to let everyone know that you’re on vacation so they don’t get confused. Read more…

A friend posted this picture on Facebook with the caption “The Bachelor’s Freezer” and given that I write a blog about being single, gay and dating, it obviously struck a nerve.

To me, this picture captures everything that is gay dating life: the sumptuous pre-date cocktail; the after dinner date “want to come over for some ice cream?” dessert; not having a date on Date Night and being totally okay with that; and those “he’s a jerk and I’m glad a Lifetime movie is about to come on” moments.

And let’s not forget the schweddy balls!  Unless I’ve known you for at least five dates, thinking that you can get away with not showering beforehand is kinda not okay. Read more…

I was sitting at my computer on Monday about to write a post on why now is a good time to break up with someone, when I got busy with work and then you-know-who filed for divorce.  I swear, maybe some of the traditional TV soap operas should “borrow” their story lines from “reality.”

Let’s put the other KK aside for a moment, shall we?  If you’re having second thoughts about spending any more time with the fella you’re currently dating, then now is a good time to have a little chat with him and here’s why: with Halloween behind us and Thanksgiving three weeks away, a large enough window exists where you can break up with someone now and both of you can “get your mind right” for entering the Holiday season as a single lady. Read more…