I was at a friend’s party having a good time when I started talking to a fine brother we’ll call “Marcel.”
Marcel was every bit of handsome: smooth chocolaty skin, great eyes, a muscular body that said, “I work out but I’m not too vain to have a little grown man weight.” All in all, Marcel was a definite candidate to be an Idris (read here).
Marcel had me immediately intrigued. This man didn’t need to spit game because he had a confidence and ease in his voice that pulled you in. Moreover he could talk, and I love it when men can “conversate” on topics out of the ordinary.
Eventually, we got to the question of “what do you do” and Marcel said, “I work out at the airport.”
“Okay” I said, as visions of kiosks and salty soft pretzels danced in my head. And he said it so matter-of-factly; like there was nothing wrong with a mid 30’s brother working this kind of job and having no other hustle going on. Read more…
How many times have you heard someone referred to as “crazy” in the single, gay and dating scene?
You make a positive comment about a guy you see across the bar for the first time and one of your friends says, “oh I went out with him on a date once and he’s crazy.” Or, “we hooked up once and he’s cray-cray!” Or when two people you know, who may or may not be independently crazy, date for a quick moment and part ways calling the other crazy.
Crazy seems to be a term that’s thrown around a lot but I’ve yet to see two people define it in the same way. Yes, someone acting stalkerish or obsessive over you is a bit cray-cray. Or a guy who literally plans your wedding after one date is a MAJOR red flag of avoidance.
But a lot of times I hear the word mentioned and it makes me wonder if the person truly is, or if it’s just a way for the speaker to quickly dismiss a bad dating situation without any explanation. A guy not being able to commit to plans or follow thru with you, doesn’t mean that he’s crazy; it just means that he wasn’t that in to you, is too emotionally immature to deal with his feelings, and that you need to move on. Read more…